Social Life?


Today, my sister said she has no social life, thanks to homework.

That surprised me.

Where I am from, for kids her age, social life is mostly hanging out with friends at school and sometimes on the weekends. A party for a birthday or when exams end etc. Family dinners and such. And there was nothing on the plate, as far as I knew. So what was she talking about?

Oh, the fact that she hasn’t checked her Facebook for three days.

*facepalm*

In our heads, the former is categorized the same as latter? Rhetorical question, really. Oh, the extent to which social media has taken over our actual social lives!

After her comment, I told myself that I would log in to my Facebook account today but log out immediately after checking notifications, rather than hang around like a boring old sod with nothing better to do. At least, today!

Crap! Facebook must be a sorcerer – I did the exact thing I promised myself I won’t do today.

Icing on the cake: I rely on social media to (self) promote my blog.

Traitor?

Maybe not. Just need to learn some self control.

And in my sister’s case, I am glad that she is currently in the process of developing a keen interest in reading. So all is not lost. *phew*

Cheers!

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How To Lose Weight?


It’s official…my diet plan really works!

And since I am such a nice and kind-hearted person who is happy only when others are happy and who only wants world peace and uses her birthday candle wish to ask for a pony, I’m going to share my super-secret (so far) and super-successful diet with you.

Magic words: it’s very simple. And does not involve any drinking of yucky cabbage soup. But close your mouth please and don’t drool over your very expensive laptop. It won’t do if you mess it up and can’t read on, you know.

1. Graduate from a four-year long Bachelors programme from a top (and hectic) university in your country.

2. If you lose some weight along the way, it would be just to your advantage. So don’t hesitate to gorge on packets of Lays and Pepsi (or Coke if that is what you prefer) in the five minutes before your next class.

3. Don pajamas and sleep like you over-dosed on sleeping pills. Do not change so that you never waste time changing when you want to sleep. Also, pajamas make good exercising clothes.

4. Exercise is very important. Switch on your computer and log on to Facebook. Hit the refresh button every five seconds.

5. For entertainment, play Tetris Battle in a separate tab. Make-up for lost time and hit the F5 every three seconds. Nothing beats calories and carbs better than F5

6. Whine to your friends how you don’t have a job. Search the online sites whenever the ‘guilt’ feels overwhelming. Then, hit back to FML and iwastesomuchtime.com

7. Eat a chocolate right before you go to bed. You really need the sugar to fall asleep and have good dreams.

8. Have a shouting match with your sister every hour. Gotta exercise those vocal chords too, you know.

9. Take seven (million) days to write a (this) blog post that doesn’t make any sense.

10. Look for a ‘saying’ to put up on the right side of your home page to make yourself feel better. Hit ‘publish’ and check your site hits every sixty seconds.

Like I said, magic! And simple! I’ve lost uncountable blog hits pounds/kilos following the above-mentioned steps.

It looks like my sugar level is low. Time for some chocolate.

[Personal note: It’s no wonder I don’t have a job, you know? I seem to even crack a good joke. It sounded better in my head before. Now the voices are telling me to delete this ASAP. Oh, bugger!]

Facebook: A New Frontier in Social Awkwardness


Facebook: A New Frontier in Social Awkwardness

Indeed, Facebook has re-defined the meaning of ‘ social awkwardness’. Much as I admire it for the it-let’s-me-keep-in-touch factor, the charm somewhat wears off as described in the above link: For example, when people feel the need to tell others about their change in relationship status, lest someone complains that they had to find out about it through Facebook.

What a stigma that must be! Take a hint, maybe? :p

I Shouldn’t Be A Blogger


I can’t blog. I just can’t.

It’s not as if I don’t have anything to say though.

I have lots to say. Lots of things and ideas are up there, swishing around. But the actual task of sitting down and typing something – anything! – up seems too tedious. I don’t feel I have the energy. There is just too much distraction.

Or maybe I’ve gotten too used to the slacking.

I mean, it’s really easy to blame Facebook and YouTube for when I am not able to work. But really, if I wanted to, couldn’t I concentrate on the work at hand? Why do I always have to leave things last minute?  Or lose my focus in the middle if I make the mistake to start work a little earlier than the last few hours?

This happens particularly when I’m ‘writing’.

But you know what happens when I do sit down to write?

I write this one amazing sentence that has been swimming in my head for a quite a while now. And then I continue with the story at hand. In a matter of ten minutes, I’ll have filled one whole page, in terms of MS Word.

And then, I’d spot some grave error and have to go back to the beginning. I’d discover that a very vital piece of information in the story line is missing and unless I go back to the beginning, the story won’t make sense.

I have another few amazing sentences littering the screen of my monitor.

But wait! I scroll back up and read through again. It still doesn’t make sense.

Cut this word here. Add that phrase there.

Move back to enjoy the view.

Hmmm…

Nope!

Will have to write the whole thing from scratch.

So all I end up with are random Word files placed around in various folders in my PC, all containing itsy bitsy pieces of the English language. I barely even look at them again.

And it’s all gone down the drain the next time my computer overheats. Oops.

Not that I am worried. I have no precious written material anyway.

Hence, why did I think I could blog? Why did I think I could make sense out of all these voices in my head? Why did I use to think I could make ‘a name’ using my writing skills? Why did I think I’d be able to write? That I’d be disciplined enough to write?

Considering the number of hours that I spend online doing absolutely nothing and being bored to death I could at least try to use my time more creatively. You’d think so!

But all this belongs to the past…It should belong to the past…It is about the here and the now. It is always about the here and the now. …

And the here and the now is here. It is this blog and I…

Electricity’s back. How I Met Your Mother would be coming on Star World soon.

Later.

Oh wait…I should delete the last two sentences…they make me sound so non-serious…

And I think I’ve missed that thing I was thinking about. I will have to rewrite this post…I shouldn’t be a blogger…!

Note to self: Must not hit the ‘publish’ button…whoopsie daisy!