What if you decide that you don’t want me there by your side anymore? she thought to herself as she sipped her tea, glancing furtively at him sitting across her.
What if you just wake up on a day just like this and you know you can’t do this anymore? That you’ve been pretending all this time and now, you’re done lying? That your mind is made up?
And I’d have no clue as to the how or the why or the when.
It could be because I’m not a suitable companion or because I understand you too well. It could be tomorrow or the next century. I could be doing the laundry or six feet under. We could have a big fight about it or just hug and let go.
Regardless, the end result would be the same: you’d be gone
And I’d be left here all by myself, being throttled to death slowly by the ghost you leave behind.
The cup of tea slipped from her trembling hands and she shakily, suddenly stood up. Alarmed, he stared at her. She could see the question and confusion in his eyes, as well as his lips trying to put sound to the thoughts running in his mind.
But he actually said nothing and that’s when she knew. It wasn’t a question of what-if at all.
In fact, there was no question; just self-doubt.
There would be no day like this. That day was here already.
She stood there, her knees feeling like jelly, waiting for his words to pop her bubble, for once and for all.
(Inspired by Coldplay’s “What If?”)